"Do you need a break from modern livin'?"

Jesse and I successfully reached the bustling metropolis that is Bullhead City. The adventures had by us have been numerous with many sure to come. Near Kingman it started snowing. Snowing. What is that all about?

There was this a BMW that we were on the level with that was doing some seriously awesome driving. It became our friend on the road. When we passed it coming near Kingman, I noticed that the driver happened to be a female type, and a cute one at that. Jesse nearly creamed himself. If he had the chance, I’m sure he would have proposed.

Jesse was also very excited by two cute girls that were in a Honda Civic. I didn’t see them, but Jesse seemed very ardent about it, so I don’t doubt him.

Here comes the exciting bit:
We had an altercation on the road with an idiot in a Dodge truck and a Suburban in front of us. Jesse and I figure that at some point we passed the Dodge earlier on, and this guy felt the need to assuage his ego by getting back in front of us. He sped up past us and gave us a look. And the look was not to invite us for tea and crumpets.

At this point, Jesse had the understandable, “Oh shit, son. No you didn’t” reaction. He wasn’t going to let the truck into what was already a fairly small opening between us and the Suburban, so got closer. The guy in true dillhole fashion, then tries to edge us out by coming into our lane, you know with us still in it. You also must understand that this was all happening within 8 feet of the Suburban in front us. So, I’m sure most everyone who reads this knows Jesse, and as you would imagine, he didn’t back down. The guy backed off, and Jesse entered a new chapter in his driving saga. He gave the guy the deuce. It was a powerful one too. I’m telling you, this sucker had oomph.

Nothing much happened until we got to the first light in Bullhead where the guy in the truck started to follow us. We knew this because his girlfriend was screaming at him and probably had been for quite some time. So we were sitting in the turn lane with the Suburban in front of us and the Dodge behind. The guy in the truck opened his door and started yelling out his door. At this point the guy driving the Suburban got clear out of the car and walked back and started yelling at the guy behind us and at us. I only really heard “motherfucker,” but it was something along the lines of “if you ever tailgate me again_______.” Fill in the blank! Aardvarks will be merry? We could no longer be BFF? His offer of road head would be null and void? Choose your own adventure!

Jesse just gave him a look. This look also did not suggest tea and crumpets. It was a calm look as opposed to an “I need to compensate for my lack of phallic length by being an asshole on the road” look. Jesse also did his thing where he wanted the guy to do something that would be a legitimate reason for busting out the Krav Manga.
The whole thing was pretty darn re-donk-ulous but funny and quite entertaining.

I’m sure there will be many other adventures to report, and I’m sure I’ll write about them, and I’m sure very few people will care much at all.

So, to the 4-6 people that read this, I hope you have a lovely and splendiferous week. I probably won’t be online much since Jesse’s house has the dial-up. (Eek!) It’s like the herpes but for internet. So take care all!