Conclusion

I have decided that too many people I know are getting married and/or spawning. I was fine when it was still, "Hey, you know RandomPerson from high school? They're baking baby batter into baby cakes." And since baby cakes sound disturbingly delicious, I was fine. Now with the sister-type getting all engaged-like, it feels like they're closing in, and the two half-used rolls of aluminum foil we have in the house might not be enough to keep them from infiltrating my brainpan with thoughts of soccer practice and gift registries.

So, my course of action is this: the next person who is closely connected to me that gets engaged/married/impregnated is going to have their sex changed, forcibly, by me. I won't go into all of the gory details, but it would involve either a hard kick to the testicular area to create a pseudo-vaginal cavity or voodoo magic and a kielbasa sausage. Do not provoke me.

Also, my congratulations to you Amanda, I am very happy for you. *emoticon*