Thursday, April 20, 2006

Input please

I've been toying with the idea of starting a new blog. I want to depart from the personal nature of this one to a more formal expression of my political, social, and humanistic views. It would be an exploratory process rather than a declaration. I'm only twenty, and I'm not so deluded and arrogant to think that my world-view is complete or ever will be for that matter. As it stands, Generic Title is what I would consider a ring toss. I'm just chucking out ideas. This new blog would be column-esque, and I would be holding it to a much higher standard than Generic Title.

I'd like to ask the people who read this for their opinions. You know, the multitudes. So, roommates, sister, and anyone directed here from my Facebook or Myspace profiles, do you think I ought to start this new blog? Let's hear it.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

I haven't subjected y'all in a while

...so here's one of my poems I wrote for my poetry workshop. It's kind of an odd one. It started out as being about this website that is supposed to send out letters in the event of the Rapture. It morphed, as all my poems are like to do, and here is the result:

“Soul Slaw”

I’ve always pictured the antichrist
looking something like Bob Dylan on
the Blonde on Blonde album cover
except with a spangly stick used
to curse the nations of the world.

I bet that spangly stick
would fetch a pretty
sumptuous price on eBay, if I could just get my hands
on it.

That’s where I got the swastika
tattoo I use as a conversation starter.
I usually keep it
on my arm, but I wear it on my forehead
when I go out to meet woman looking for
a good time
or big, burly, bald men looking for
a hate crime.

I like my hate crimes best
with a side of slaw.
There really is nothing quite like
getting back home after a night of beating
and bashing to a ten gallon
tub of slaw waiting
to be eaten and bathed in.
A baptism in slaw
would be the thing, I think,
that would take away the sins of the world.

The baptism fonts ought to be filled
with the sin-absolving slaw, and the world
could be made right.
And in it’s new rightness, the world could
once again fall from grace at the cost
of $19.99 a month with access to dozens
of adult websites.


And you saw it first here, folks.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Illegal activities

Someone has perpetrated an illegal act against me. It seems that a Lebanese man by the name Mr Audu Mohammed and some Nigerian representatives have made a contract claim for $10.5M to be transferred to an account in Spain. The people at the Central Bank of Nigeria have contacted me via email because of some discrepancies in the paperwork. I don't know what's going on here because that contract was for $8.25M to be transferred to Denmark. Rest assured that the right phone calls will be made. I will not tolerate this breach in security. That is the last time I go to the Lebanese for a job. It was barely done within an acceptable margin of error and now this. I won't stand for it.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Space well utilized

The land use of Antarctica is:

98% ice
2% barren rock

Sunday, April 09, 2006

"Jesused"

I got Jesused last night. "What does it mean to be Jesused?" you might ask. Well, to be Jesused means that someone hands you something that you think might be coupons or a discount card of some sort, but it is actually some form of what I'll call religious propaganda. I don't want it to seem like I'm going on a mission against Christianity. I'd really like Christianity if Christians actually practiced it.

"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22:37-40

Am I somehow mistaken when I say that the second greatest commandment according to Jesus Christ, the Lord and Savior in the Christian faith, the Son of God, is to love your neighbor as yourself? That has to carry some weight, I would imagine. This is where I'm confused. How is it that trying to deny gays their basic human rights fulfils that commandment? That doesn't seem like a loving action to me. I know Christianity has a basic issue with homosexuality, but I'd like to challenge everyday Christians to actually back why it is that they disagree with homosexuality. "It's a sin" isn't an adequate answer. I could say fingerpainting is a sin, and it doesn't make it so. I know there are passages in the Bible that deal with this issue, but that in itself raises the issue of whether or not the Holy Bible is wholly divine. It's a book written by men, translated by men, and subject to the editing of who knows how many different rulers and teachers. Still, you ought to be able to back up your statements and give some textual evidence, and try reading your guidelines instead of getting everything from the minister. That's what the Reformation was all about all you Protestants. It argued that the common man was able to commune with God directly and ask for forgiveness and such. Isn't depending on the clergy for all your knowledge of your faith basically the same issue? How do you know they're not pushing their own agenda or tailoring the religion to their own personal beliefs? You really don't know until you go to the text yourself.

This card that I got Jesused with had the basic message that in order to be moral, one had to obey the Ten Commandments. Morality is not determined by what has become the de facto state religion of the United States. An atheist can be the epitome of morality in a general sense but since the first five of the Ten Commandments are exclusive to a Judeo-Christian faith, is the atheist therefore immoral? That's ridiculous. Christianity was once wrong until Constantine made it the state religion of the Roman Empire. Sure, Christianity is considered to the end-all religion in the United States at the moment, but it would be incredibly arrogant to think that it will always be so.

I'm telling you, Christianity would be a lot more appealing without all the Christians.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Jeezy Chreezy

I think I've figured out what "the saddest thing ever" would be. Imagine for a second if all religions were false, and they had no basis in anything more than a human tendency to reach for a divine that isn't there, to seek something more that the biological cycle of life and death. I'm not saying that that in itself would sadden me. What would be sad is that everything ever done in the name of religion would have been in vain. Every war started with religion as a motivator would have been without meaning. All the hate towards those who are different would have had no cause. The Christian right would have no purpose, but they're not really concerned with religion anyways. I think that would just be very sad.

To round out this religion based post, I'd like to say a few things about faith. I understand the basis of Christianity is in faith. I'm not denying that when I say that faith alone is not enough. It's all well and good that a person can say that they believe Jesus is their Lord and Savior and that he came and died to forgive everyone's sins. But does it seem like that's just about the extent of a lot of Christians' knowledge about the religion. I mean, it seems to me that if someone is going to vocal and proud of their religion, they ought to do the reading and be able to back up what they say about it. (Let's just leave out the fact that the New Testament, the gospels at least, was written about a century after the events it describes and that it was collects in the form we know now about 200 years after that) It looks to me that Christianity is becoming an oral tradition because most Christians tend to take the word of their pastors/priests/others in the religion. Does that seem wrong to anyone else? This really ought not bother me as much as it does. It just seems I can never escape the frustrations about Christianity I feel because it was so much a part of my childhood/adolescence. Personally, I want to believe that there's something more to life than the reproduction cycle. But just because we have language and the ability (if not the practice) of rational thought doesn't make it so. If you ever want to know why I decided to be a writer, this is the answer. I can never get these sorts of things out of my head. I'll just leave it at that since if I go over everything, I'll dismiss it as a bunch of convoluted crap and delete it.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Urinary Adventures

I would like, if I may, to tell about something I witnessed just a little while ago before the event slips from my mind. I was in the bathroom in the student union. You just know this has to be good now, huh? Well anyway, I had finished doing my business, and I was washing and drying my hands. This is when I looked in the mirror, and reflected in it was a man who had just walked up to the urinal. I saw him pulling at the leg of his shorts, and before I had fully figured out what the hell he was doing, he was urinating out the leg of his shorts. I can only guess that he maneuvered his funny business around and got it to point out the leg of the shorts. Now, this just baffled me. Why would anyone ever in the history of ever use the leg of their shorts as an escape hatch? It seems like a faulty system to me. One false move and you've got piss all down your leg without pants or underwear to help protect the sanitation of your leg. Me, I'll stick with a more traditional approach. Pants have zippers and I intend to use them. I suppose I'm just old-fashioned that way.

It's coming...

It's really starting to hit me that after these next four weeks of school, I'll be halfway done with undergrad. I know that for sure since barring some horrible cock-up I'll be completing my degree in the traditional four years. Seeing as I only need 15 units a semester to achieve the 120 credit requirement for graduation, I don't foresee a problem. I could actually add a whole second major and still graduate on time without overextending too much. I wouldn't do that because I'm a big believer in not putting in more work than I ought to. This all just really means that I'm grappling with the reality of what I'm going to do after I graduate with my personally fulfilling but otherwise thoroughly useless degree. One thing I am excited about is that next semester I'll be taking ENGL304 which is Intermediate Fiction Writing. Huzzah! With that thought I head off to bed so I can arise early to do some homework I was too lazy to do tonight and work on my new story.

Monday, April 03, 2006

One more

There a new addition to Unit 2. She's a 8 month-old puppy, a German Sheppard mix. Jesse adopted the dog he was looking at while at the Humane Society. Her name was Lady, but we all thought that was a totally lame name for a dog, so she's now called Isabelle. She's a sweet dog. She doesn't really bark either. That's a definite plus with Kia's incessant buffing at anything that comes remotely close to the house. I like her. She's a loving dog and likes to be on beds. She just to the left of me while I'm writing this actually. Jesse's off getting some doggy essentials, so since I had Linguistics to work on, I must attend to the arduous task of keeping Isabelle upstairs. That's all kinds of easy because:

1) All she's doing is sleeping
2) She's displayed behavior that she's territorial of the upstairs portion of the house
3) She has yet to navigate the stairs downwards without help yet.

It's kind of weird, Isabelle is the kind of dog that I'd like to have if I got a dog. She makes me kind of want to get one of my own instead of a cat. Four dogs might be too many in a house of three people next year. They wouldn't be able to all go on a walk at once. I'm a ways away from making a decision on this since I really can't afford to put out the $180 it would cost to get a pet. Maybe once I get a job, I'll put more serious thought into it. Jesse, I blame you and your excellent taste in dogs for making me want a dog of my own.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

More Importantly

I forgot to write about the more important part of yesterday. Jesse, Kristi, and I went to look at Unit 1, our future residence. I really liked the place. It was completely tiled, and the rooms were large. The weird part about it is that when we went in with the management, the three girls who are currently renting it didn't wake up when we knocked, when Tina yelled "Management" when we came in, or when we were looking around the house including poking our heads into each of their rooms. Four people moving around a house that size would've woke me up. Bizarre.

Moving on, there was Faire today! Yay for Faire! No yay for sore feet after walking around the Renn Faire. Definitely no yay for that. I went with Jesse and Kristi, and it was most enjoyable. We quested for a hair spiral and a tiara for Kristi as closing time was approaching. Kristi was hassled by the guy selling shiny butterflies on a stick. He was a bigger guy with a thick, bushy mustache and he was hawking these spangly butterflies with streamers and everything. He must have gotten in trouble or something and that was his penance. More effective than the stocks, I'd say.

Four and a half weeks of classes. Rock!

Saturday, April 01, 2006

I will prevail

We've had some pet adventure hereabouts recently. Today, we picked up a schnauzer that decided that running across Grant would be a capital idea. We put up fliers for it, and the woman who owned her soon claimed her. Not before Jesse got all attached though. So, we went to the Humane Society to look at dogs and check on Jesse's allergy quotient to cats. I miss cats so much. I spent some time with Simba when I was at my parent's house last weekend. I have decided that I want to get a cat. I want a cat because regardless of what the popular opinion says, cats are still way better than dogs. The Humane Society had a really sweet cat named Boots that I liked. There would be some obstacles, but I am undaunted. Nothing shall stand in the way of me and my goal. Nothing I say. I shall be avenged! ...I mean, get a cat. I am a little put off by the $180 I'd have to pay for the adoption and the deposit.

Update: I coughed while snacking and ended up with half of a Cheez-It Twisterz going up my nasal passages. That totally sucked. It stings in there now.